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How to Overcome Shyness

By Exforsys | on December 27, 2008 |
Life Skills

Why Shyness is a Trait which Must be Overcome

Shyness is a common problem which is often seen as being negative. No matter who you are, there are times in your life when you will become shy, and it is a trait that can be frustrating because it can limit you.

Before we talk more about this subject, let us realise why being shy is not cute, and can actually cause a number of different problems in your life if you are unable to overcome it.

First off, a number of statistics have shown that almost half the entire U.S. population is shy.  Other studies have shown that men who are shy tend to marry when they are much older, especially when compared to their non-shy counterparts.

The biggest problem that comes with being shy is that it causes you to miss out a number of opportunities.

When you are shy, it is hard to develop not only personal relationships, but business relationships as well.

If you have a business idea, but you are too shy to approach a potential investor, how can you ever get the idea off the ground?

The essence of overcoming shyness is to gain life skills which will reduce its impact. One thing that needs to be emphasized is that there is nothing wrong with being a little shy, in fact, being too outgoing can be just as bad as being too shy.

You can generally tell that shyness is a problem when you find that you are damaging your business and personal relationships because of it.

One method of overcoming shyness is to work on your social skills. The best way to do this is to spend time around people.

The more you meet and talk with people, the better you will become at overcoming your shy tendencies.

Start With One Friend or Business Partner

If you are like most people, you will have at least one friend who you can talk with and confide in. This friend probably has other friends, or people that he knows, who you are not familiar with.

If you are too shy to walk up to people blindly on the street to talk, then you can use a friend to help you meet with other people, who can in turn help you meet with other people. This is what I call "building a growing network." 

The concept of growing a network can work with business relationships as well. If you have valuable skills which can allow you to make money, but you are too shy to cold call on potential clients, you can find someone who has good social or sales skills to do this part for you, and you can compensate them for it.

Once you meet with the clients, you can break the ice and get to know them, building up your social skills.

By doing a good job for them, they can then recommend your services to friends, family, or other business partners, and this can allow you to build a network of important contacts.

As you can see, overcoming your shyness can start with one person. As you begin meeting people on a regular basis, you will gradually begin to overcome your shyness.

In addition to this, the self confidence that you will gain can allow you to become the type of person that you did like to be.

A really shy person can start off with their family, since they will most likely be more comfortable with them as opposed to meeting strangers for the first time. The key to overcoming shyness is to be exposed to people you do not know.

Other Skills that Can Allow You to Overcome Shyness

Being an effective communicator is a great way to avoid being too shy. If you are great at listening for example, you will find that you can easily build relationships very quickly.

It is also important to read the body language of others. People will often convey messages with their bodies that they do not communicate with their mouths.

« « Essential Job Skills for Life
Art of Being Assertive » »

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Editorial Team at Exforsys is a team of IT Consulting and Training team led by Chandra Vennapoosa.

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