To become successful in life, it is necessary for you to work with others. Few successes are a result of just one man or woman’s effort, and there is typically a long list of people who helped the individual succeed. However, the need to work with people also means that some of the people we work with may be difficult. Most of us are familiar with difficult people. No matter what you do for them, they are never pleased with it, or they always give you a hard time. They tend to be picky about things that are not truly important, and may even be unpleasant to be around altogether.
While it is simple to say that you will avoid difficult type of people, there are situations in which you simply cannot avoid working with them. For example, if you are working at a job that involves customer service, there is little doubt that you will run into difficult people on a daily basis. There are also times in which the difficult person you are dealing with is an authority, or is someone you need something from, and it is not simple enough to just avoid dealing with them.
When you deal with difficult people, one thing that you have to keep in mind is that they probably will not change. Therefore, you will need to accept the way they are. There are times at which all of us are not pleasant to be around, so we should expect others to accept these weaknesses as well.
Another key factor in dealing with difficult people is to "always remain calm." When you are calm with these types of people, you are always in control. You can stay calm by remembering a number of things. First, you are only dealing with an individual because you need to obtain a desired end. If this is not the case, then you have no reason to deal with this person.
For example, if your job requires you to work in customer service, though you may hate dealing with difficult people, you can remain calm by remembering that you are there to get paid, and dealing with them is simply an inconvenience which you must go through to achieve this.
Don’t take Hostility from Difficult People Personally
It is always a bad idea to take hostility personally, especially when it comes from difficult people. Many times, a difficult person is not acting hostile to you because they do not like you, because they do not even know you. It likely comes from something that has happened to them. Maybe they are having a bad day. Maybe they are just tired.
Perhaps they are suffering from an illness, or have recently had a loss in the family. Sometimes people take out their emotions on others, just because it will make them feel better, particularly when the person reacts to them. By remaining calm, you remain above their level, and you do not give them the pleasure of making you feel upset.
Whenever you are working with difficult people, it is very important for you to pay close attention to your body language. Avoid doing things that show that you are upset, like frowning, gritting your teeth, or clenching your fists. Try your best to simply relax. Stay calm, and breath deeply. When you do this, it is not a sign that you are backing down, but shows that you are in control, because you do not allow them to get to you.
In fact, the difficult person may suddenly become humbled, since they can see that their attempts to unravel you are ineffective. While you should never respond with negativity, it is also a bad idea to appear to be afraid. You should never let people push you around, under any circumstances.
When I worked at the bank a few years ago, I remember a woman who went with me through orientation after we got hired. Our job was to perform customer service on the phone. During the very first day on the job, she quit. Not only did she quit, but she was seen visibly crying at her desk. I never knew what the customer said to her when she was speaking to him, but the one thing I know for sure is that the way she reacted allowed victory for the person she was talking to. By quitting, she walked away from a job that she had gone through a week of orientation to get, not to mention the extensive hiring process.
Never Let Difficult People Unravel You
There are some of us who have shorter fuses than others, and it does not take much for us to blow up. If you are this type of person, then it is even more important for you to follow the things mentioned above in this article. Remember, when you react to difficult people in a negative manner, "they win". Reacting to a difficult person in a negative manner may even cause you to lose your job.